Remember ...

I understand this is a holiday, and I try not to ask too much of people. I also try hard not to preach, especially when it comes to things not related to the goofy world of sports.

But Memorial Day is supposed to be about more than a day off work, barbecues, and time outside. This is a chance to salute those who have given their lives in defense of our freedoms.

Please remember that on this day.

Happy Fourth of July

I hope everyone has a safe and enjoyable weekend. May there be plenty of, well ...


Also, please remember that this day is about the anniversary of this great country's independence.

Take it away, Lee.



We'll talk to you again on Monday, hopefully after the Brewers find a way to win two at Wrigley Stadium.

Michael Jackson Will Only Die Once

A shocking assertion from an MSNBC reporter as news broke of Michael Jackson's death last week.

SHOCKING!

Saw this bit on The Daily Show Tuesday night, as Jon Stewart awesomely made fun of the media for being the media.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
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In case you think that was somehow doctored, here you go.



Obviously, there are tabloids that fundamentally disagree with this notion, and they'll prove that in the future. It shouldn't be too long before some random publication accuses Jackson of faking his own death.

We must be horribly short on people who are willing to take jobs working as television reporters. It's the only way to explain the sometimes self-serving and more often completely incompetent nature of today's reporters.

LIPSTICK ON A PIG: SARAH PALIN IS BACK

Nothing drives me crazier than fake outrage. In this particular case, the Republican establishment is lining up outside CBS headquarters with their torches.

Sometimes, it goes the other way.

You see, everyone out there gets mad for no reason at least once in their lives. Remember the "lipstick on a pig" bit? People were really mad over it, even though it obviously had nothing to do with Sarah Palin.

Palin's return to the news comes courtesy of a David Letterman Top Ten list. Enjoy.



The "slutty flight attendant" line was a 500-foot home run to dead-center field.

Palin got pissed. Big shock.

But the diciest joke centered on the family attending a Yankees baseball game.

Letterman said "an awkward moment" occurred for Palin when, "during the seventh inning, her daughter was knocked up by (Yankee third baseman) Alex Rodriguez."

Without naming her, the joke seemed to refer to Palin's 18-year-old daughter Bristol, an unwed mother.

But it was 14-year-old daughter Willow, not Bristol, who had been at the game.

Todd Palin issued a statement that said "any 'jokes' about raping my 14-year-old are despicable."

And Sarah Palin charged Letterman with "sexually perverted comments made by a 62-year-old male celebrity."

Letterman responded Wednesday night.



Perfectly played, sir. That's why Letterman rules late night.

Let's make a list of things David Letterman did NOT do in these jokes.

1. Call Sarah Palin a slut.
2. Joke about ARod "knocking up" her 14-year-old daughter

If you're incapable of understanding these jokes and their proper context, you shouldn't be watching Letterman. In fact, it would probably help you to not watch any television or read anything on the internet.

Maybe Palin will someday understand this while she stares at Russia from the big window in the governor's mansion.

REPLACING PAWLENTY

We don't deviate from sports very often around here. It's usually an important story when it does happen.

This qualifies, at least for the Minnesota portion of our readership (all three of you). Two-term Governor Tim Pawlenty has decided not to run for a third term.

(Insert "He's done paw-lenty around here" joke here. Ha ha.)

2012 and a potential presidential run is a long way away, and I really don't care about that. The point isn't to speculate about Pawlenty's political future. Instead, where the hell is Minnesota going to move from here?

Pawlenty has been a lot of things to a lot of people, and while you may not agree with some of his decisions (I know I don't), it's hard to argue that he has been a strong leader in a time where so many leaders are weak-minded individuals.

(Voters, too, are weak-minded. I applaud Pawlenty for imposing his own term limit, because we've learned many times over the years that the voters are too stupid to limit the terms of annoying, snake-oil-selling career politicians.)

That strength has sometimes led to an annoying stubbornness. Pawlenty has refused to allow any taxes to be raised, leaving the state in need of massive budget cuts to rid itself of a large projected deficit. He's been consistent with this stance for his two terms in office, and something tells me he won't waver before he finally does walk.

His strong leadership (or "stubbornness", if you prefer) has led to much in-fighting with the Democrat-controlled Legislature over taxes and government spending. I'm not a fan of big government, and I fear where this state could have gone if he hadn't put the lid on taxes. Instead, Minnesota government has come under much more control than it had before.

The fighting we've been seeing between the two sides makes it clear what Minnesota needs in the governor's mansion next.

A moderate.

If the DFL gets their way, and their candidate of choice is elected in November of 2010, the state will move back toward higher taxes and more government spending, things we don't need. However, the election of another conservative would cause just as much, if not more, fighting.

That's not what this state needs. Minnesota needs a strong moderate governor who will hold the line on spending, compromise when necessary to get important things done, not play the blame game (an incredibly frustrating trait of Pawlenty's), and who won't have the look of someone who wants higher office soon.

Pawlenty generally did a good job, and I salute him for his efforts. It's not an easy job, and he tackled it with energy, zeal, and strong leadership. I also tip my cap to him for stepping away, no matter the actual motivation for that decision.

SOME GAVE ALL

THE BRILLIANCE OF COLBERT AND STEWART

Not nearly enough time is spent in this house watching Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart blow apart the "news".

The Comedy Central veterans each host a half-hour show on weeknights, and the idea (in part) is to pretty much make all the other news outlets look stupid.

With the swine flu OMG WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE epidemic in the news, both of them had a field day. We'll start with Colbert.

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Now, on to Stewart.

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I'm not here to trivialize sickness or death, but as the Stewart clip points out, we're going a little bit too far here.

Yes, educating the public is important, but non-stop coverage of this thing is not. We were also supposed to get ourselves or a bunch of animals wiped out by SARS, chronic wasting disease, mad cow disease, and bird flu.

We're. Still. Here.

By all means, cancel your trip to Mexico. Go somewhere else for vacation. If you come back, go ahead and lock yourself in the house for a month so you don't give swine flu to anyone but the mailman.

Just leave me out of it, okay.

JON STEWART PANTSES JIM CRAMER

Oh, not really.

This particular video is not of the sports realm. Instead, it shows why the news media is so frowned-upon in this country.

After all, it takes a satirical program to do what a real news program should have been doing all along. Too bad that Jessica Simpson's "sudden weight gain" was more important.

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

Jim Cramer Pt. 2

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WHY GOVERNMENT IS USELESS, NO MATTER WHO IS PRESIDENT

WARNING - Non-sports post ahead

Sorry. This one is the fault of our current President. I voted for him, and I think he'll do an admirable job.

However, this is entirely stupid.

Michael J. Copps, the acting chairman of the Federal Communications Commission, said in a statement that the additional four months of (digital TV) transition time would afford “urgently needed time for a more phased transition.”

Broadcasters were scheduled to end analog broadcasts on Feb. 17.

To me, this is an admission that the government wasted $1 billion on an information blitz for the DTV switch. If one person who uses their television more than once a day is not ready for the changeover now, four months isn't going to help any. Not one bit. Those stupid people will be equally not ready then.

So what's the point?

“Yes, it would be great if everyone had received their coupons, and if everybody understood the transition to digital, but they don’t,” Representative Maxine Waters, a Democrat from California, said Wednesday during the House’s debate. She said that some people, senior citizens in particular, were going to be “terribly inconvenienced.”

Some House Republicans had opposed a delay, saying that it would only increase confusion about the impending transition. “No matter what date you establish, there’s always going to be somebody who doesn’t get the message,” Representative Cliff Stearns, a Republican from Florida, said during the House debate.

THANK YOU, MR. STEARNS.

Listen. I've got plenty of respect for the fact that there are a lot of people who don't understand what this is all about. I also understand that I watch enough TV that I've had the message beaten over my head, and I have no choice but to understand it by now.

But with all the annoucements running during all hours of the day, how could someone not understand what's going on? At the very least, how could people not make the call to a toll-free number and get some answers to their questions?

We've had a long time to prepare for this changeover. The Obama administration may think they mean well, but all they are going to do is add confusion ... especially when you look at the fact some stations have already made the change. Others plan to make it as scheduled on February 17/18. Once they get FCC approval, a station can make the change before June 12.

How is that not going to be confusing?

Thanks, government. Way to drop the ball. Again.

PONDERING LIFE...

Not sports related, but it's about life instead. Sorry if you don't like that.

I'm curious about something.

Am I the only human being on the planet that can remember who hit the ground ball that got by Buckner in Game Six of the 1986 World Series, but can't remember to check everything that goes in my freaking kid's hockey bag?

As a result, his breezers are missing, he had to miss practice tonight, and I'm stuck sitting here, pissed off at myself. And I'm out $95. There's that, too. Freaking hell.

I can't be the only person around that has this problem. Right?

Help? Anyone?